Long distance relationships can be impossible to some people. People often wonder why couples do it. How do they cope? Isn’t there trust issues? What about communication? So many questions about how long distance works and what happens within them.
It can be really difficult sometimes. When you’re sad, you can’t just ask them to come over and bring your favourite snacks. You can’t ask them to hang out because they’re so far away. But even though you miss some time with them, the time you do have with them makes up for all the time you are apart.
I have been in a long distance relationship for 2 years and 7 months (on 7th July 2016). And we are still as in love as we were right at the start of our relationship. We met in October 2013 on Blackberry Messenger, and we met in person on 7th December 2013 and decided to be together officially as a couple. There is 53 miles between us, and it would take us roughly 60-90 mins to get to each other by car. By train, it is a similar time.
If you want to be with someone, effort is key. There is no excuse for not making efforts in this type of relationship, because effort is the thing that may keep you together (aswell as the love you have for each other). If you wanna be with someone who lives far away, don’t think that it’s impossible. Because it’s possible. And there are things you need to consider beforehand. But it is POSSIBLE.
COMMUNICATION – This is very important for long distance. This may include texting, phone calls, FaceTime (or any other type of video chat). And always validation. Sometimes your other half may not reply for a while, and that’s okay. Don’t get paranoid or annoyed at them. They may be working, busy, or doing something with friends. Scheduling video chats or phone calls can also be a good way of working out your day. Some people may have a busy lifestyle, so arranging your phone calls and video chats can be helpful when you have free time.
TRAVEL – Yes, unfortunately this is something that you have to do in long distance relationships. You will have to pay for transport, and it’s really annoying. I travel by train, and it can be expensive. My train fare is £22.00. But with a Rail Card, I pay £14.50 open return! Which is a great saving. Another tip I would give is to split tickets. Pay for single journeys and book in advance. Last week, I paid just £5.35 for 2 trains (because I saved my return from last time) and saved loads of money! Rail Cards are just £30 for 1 year, or £70 for 3 years. Always try and look for the cheaper way to travel (because there always is a way!).
DON’T SHUT OUT YOUR FRIENDS – You may think that because you’re long distance, you need to save all of your money and time for when you see that person. I have to admit, I’ve been guilty of this. But make sure that you go out with your friends and keep busy when you’re at home. It will make you feel balanced, and so much better about your situation. Your friends will always have your back, even if your other half doesn’t. Friends are the best medicine.
TRUST – Just because your other half hasn’t replied to your text in 3 hours, it doesn’t mean that they’re out with somebody else or doing things with somebody else. Don’t get paranoid over it; it will only result in unnecessary arguments and breaking your own heart. Trust that they are out with their friends, at work, busy doing something else, etc. They don’t live on their phone and neither should you. Don’t overreact about it.
Long distance is hard, but I honestly would not have it any other way. I’m with somebody who has cherished me and appreciates me for who I am (even if that means me being a little weird sometimes), and will always support me through anything I’m going through. If you love somebody or wanna be somebody, don’t let the miles between you stop you from doing that. Love will always find a way.
Lots of love,